To Serve

Sometimes after a long day of doing what's expected of me, it is hard to think of ways to treat my wife and hard to find the energy to follow through with them. But I know she deserves it and anyone could do it if it were easy.

Another Great Weekend.

MissusB and I had a great weekend. We're in the process of moving to another town and we got some solid progress done on that. We didn't have our regular Friday date night. I don't think there was a reason. It just didn't happen.

Saturday morning as we were spooning in bed, MissusB started to move just a little bit in a way that is easy to recognize and we had some hot, quick, sex. It was hot for obvious reasons, but it was quick partly because I am kind of short triggered these days and partly because the baby woke up. I took the baby out to the other room while MissusB finished herself off with her buzzer.

Sunday night I was allowed to give her a nice long foot and calf massage and eventually invited to just keep massaging up from there. While I did that, MissusB caught up with my caption blog, which she reads intermittently. When she was done with that put on some porn for herself to watch over my shoulder while I got to basically make out with her clit. I don't know how long I got to do that, I was transported.  When my back gave out from bending over her, we switched to the vibrator and she came a couple times. I got to keep striving.

I'm a very lucky man.

Date Night

Friday was everything I'd hoped it would be.

We talked a watched a little TV after the baby went to sleep and then MissusB sent me to fetch condoms and sex toys from the bedroom while she stretched out on the couch.

When I got back, she had me stand near her head and proceeded to tease me deliciously with her mouth. Before long she wanted fucked. She put me on my back on the couch and climbed on top. After just a few amazing thrusts, she told me to be still and started to get herself off with her vibrator. At first I couldn't feel the vibrations much, but as she sat there stuck on my hard cock while I had to use all my failing concentration to stop myself from thrusting, the buzzing started to build.

As amazing as that feeling was, I really felt transported by the feeling of the skin on her thighs and ass against both my hands and my own thighs. I've never felt skin as wonderful to stroke and pet as hers.

Afterward, we had a very sweet and romantic conversation about how wonderful we feel right after great sex together. The feeling is fleeting and the best memories are very pale beside the real thing, but you do remember well that something wonderful happened.

I'm a very lucky man.

Absent

Not long after my last post, I more or less figured that this second attempt at FLR was over. Basically, there wasn't anything happening. I still was doing the housework, but I'm an at home dad, so that's natural. I wasn't up to my best but it was getting done.

We had some her MissusB's family in town for more than a week. Things just were not particularly anything in particular. I mentioned at one point that I had basically given up on FLR, but it was in a context where we couldn't get into it. MissusB just said, "No, you don't get to decide whether we are doing FLR or not." Then we had to continue whatever we were talking about and never got back to it. Honestly, it wasn't even on my mind.

In my mind, it was basically back to equal partners. I did hold back on masturbating assuming we'd talk things over at some point.

Then Tuesday night, as we were going to sleep, I said something about wanting to have sex just as I would have before FLR. Not pressuring, just an invitation. MissusB responded immediately, "You aren't getting any sex until this house is spotless." Just like that I was back to being hers again. We went to sleep after a chaste kiss.

Wednesday I cleaned as much and as thoroughly as I could manage in the time I wasn't taking care of the baby, but the house was definitely not spotless when MissusB got home. It was close, but there were a few things that clearly needed work. I got no dusting, sweeping, or mopping done in the bedroom, for instance, because the baby was asleep in there when I had time to clean.

I was very attentive all evening and was debating whether I should own up to my feelings that I still had work to do or whether I should take her generosity if she offered it. It didn't end up being as issue, because MissusB said it needed work but that she was sure I could get it done Thursday. Later, as we lay in bed before sleep she decided to use her Magic Wand and I got very excited. I don't think I have ever felt as desperate to slide into someone as I was at that moment. I begged and pleaded and must had no pride at all. Eventually, MissusB was busting up laughing at me, but it didn't slow me down. When she finally ordered me to settle down it was incredibly difficult to control myself.

Yesterday was Thursday. I apologized in morning, but she assured me that she had enjoyed herself and found it very sexy. I had no idea I was able to stay that excited while my wife openly laughed at me, let alone that I was married to a woman who would do it.

Again, I cleaned with nearly all the time and energy I had. While the house wouldn't have passed a strict military inspection, it was as clean as any house we've ever lived in together if not cleaner. We went out to dinner with some friends, so MissusB didn't see it until very late. She didn't offer any complaints, but made it clear we weren't going to be making love anyway.

This morning at breakfast, she mentioned a few little things she wanted to see improved today and suggested that I had good chances tonight. Friday is generally a "date night" for us anyway. These days, between the baby and not being in our twenties anymore, that often just amounts to having more than one glass of wine and maybe staying up an hour later. It means more, though, because it means that some time every week is dedicated to us as a couple. So, needless to say, I'm looking forward to a lovely night with MissusB.

reconnected

We had some friends over tonight. Most of today was spent cleaning and preparing for their arrival. MissusB did a lot of work, which made me a bit uncomfortable at first, but she seemed to want to, so I didn't say anything. It was just a nice day together.

We laid down for a nap that got sidetracked by MissusB vibrating herself to an orgasm. Then she asked me if I was excited and told me good night. However, she then reached over with the vibrator and started rubbing it over my stiff cock. She did that for a few minutes and I asked if I could come. It had been two weeks, which is longer than I've gone since we've been married, even counting when the baby was born. She said I could and it was fantastic.

Then we napped just a little and went back to preparing for our guests. It feels like the recent friction is just about totally behind us.

One of my in laws is coming for a visit soon, so I expect that will have a big impact on things around here both between MissusB and me and between the Internet and me. I'm not guessing it will be for the worse in either case, but I do anticipate and impact.

Lately

MissusB and I have been a bit distant for a while.

We've been basically just hanging around each other. We had an argument about two weeks ago and have each been dealing with the aftermath in our own way. Wednesday we had the aftershock argument. I think we have got things pretty well reknit.

FLR came up a bit in the original argument but I think it was more a distraction than actually relevant. Then in the meantime, neither of us has been really relating to each other in any meaningful way including leading or following.

During the follow up, I said that it didn't seem like FLR was making anything better for either of us and that we might as well give it up. I should back up, actually. Leading into the conversation, MissusB started telling me that I need to do this and that. It felt strange and not great. She had just been out of that role for long enough that it didn't make sense right away. Then we talked about things.

So, when I said that I didn't think FLR was getting us anything, she said I was no longer doing it right and that it had been good for her when I had been. When I talked about giving it up, she said "It isn't up to you whether we do FLR or not." and it wasn't a pose at all. As little as she has been leading, she still feels it is her decision. And she's right of course. Even before we were officially female led, she made the decisions and even if we ever go back to officially equal partners, she will be making the decisions.

So, we removed the splinter from our paw and are well on our way to mending. She's even mentioned the possibility of romance sometime soon.

Nothing Much

MissusB has been having some health issues that have taken basically all her energy. I've been taking care of the house she's been cooking a little. We've generally just been taking it easy. Nothing sexy happening. We've hardly left the house, really. She did apologize last night that we haven't had sex in a while. It was a very non-FLR moment and I just hope I handled it sensitively. While it is sexy for my wife to deny me sex or release and it can make her feel sexier and more powerful, it doesn't work that way when she feels like it isn't her choice either. Both of us are being rather unsexilly denied by her health issues. I assured her that I was fine and that I missed the cuddling more than anything else, but more than anything I just want her to get to feel ok.

So, there we stand until who knows when. I can only hope for her sake that she starts to feel better soon and can get back to a full enjoyment of life and love and everything she likes.